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Robbed of her virginity

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by: Deborah Choo/

This article was first published in ‘Lady in the mirror‘. We thank Deborah for allowing TOC to reproduce it in full here.


Nakisha (not her real name) was brutally raped of her virginity one morning by her employer’s 24-year old son. When her employer learnt of the incident, he threatened Nakisha to remain silent about the incident. In exchange, he promised to send his son away to Thailand. “I am doing this to protect you,” he had said to Nakisha. Terrified, she cowered.

The deal was struck.

Six months ago, she sat at a table in Humanitarian Organization of Migration Economics (HOME), a migrant workers shelter. She had just fled from her employer’s house.

When I sat her down for the interview, she had just returned from a psychological test at the Institute of Mental Health (IMH). She was brought there by the President of HOME, Ms Bridget Tan. “I feared that she would have any psychological and emotional trauma after what she’s been through so I brought her for a mental test. She remains strong,” said Bridget.

***

Her predicament, as unfortunate as it is, is not unique out of the 196,000 women who work as foreign domestic workers in Singapore. These women usually come from neighboring countries such as Philippines, Indonesia, Thailand, Myanmar, and India.

The Human Rights Report 2005 – Maid to Order called for the end to abuse of foreign domestic workers.  According to a BBC report, it stated that “The report paints a grim picture of young women trapped in apartment blocks, beaten, sometimes raped, killed or driven to suicide by their employers.”

Even as Nakisha related the scenario throughout the interview, she struggled to keep her composure.  Flashbacks of the dreadful incident haunted the shadow of her eyes as she fought tears back that threatened to surface. She recounted the incident to me.

***

It all began in late July 2009 when this Indonesian lady started work. Trouble surfaced almost immediately. For the first five months, her ex-employer’s second son began sexually harassing her.  When he got bolder, he explicitly told her that he wanted to sleep with her. She refused. However, because she was afraid, she never told this to her employer.

In the wee hours on the morning of 29 December, 2010, when the sky was still dark, the man returned home from work all drunk. Entering the house, he saw Nakisha. Lumbering across to her, he forcefully dragged Nakisha into his room, covered her mouth, and and raped her.

His parents were in the next room sound asleep.

The moment he was done, he got off Nakisha, gathered all his clothes, and left her on the bed. But not without a threat before he left. “If you tell this to my mother, I will do something to you.”

Paralyzed with fear, she sobbed in silence and told no one of the incident then.

However, the man continued to rape her on multiple occasions over the next two to three months so frequently that one day she decided that that was the limit. “I cannot take it anymore,” she told me.

Sometime before the Chinese New Year of 2010, Nakisha called her agency for help. Then one night after Chinese New Year, her employer abruptly woke her up at 1 a.m. in the morning and dragged her down to his chicken rice stall. Sitting her down, he tried to convince her to lie to her agency. He wanted her to tell her agency that she only made up the story of being sexually assaulted because she was homesick and wanted to return home.

“My boss told me to tell my agency that his son did not rape me and that I lied. He said ‘you imagine if you have a brother and your brother did this kind of things and the whole world knows, how would you feel? Think of your family in the same situation.’” Nakisha related to me in the words of her employer.

So that was what she did. However she stated that should the son rape her one more time, she will go to the police.

The next month, the son was sent away to Thailand. Even before he left, he showed no signs of repentance. “He see me he also say ‘not like I did anything wrong. It’s not a problem.’” Nakisha told me of what her rapist said to her.

***

She continued work with the family as usual. Fast forward a brief nine months, and her rapist is back. Worse, behaving as if what he did to her was not a big deal.

All the repressed feelings and images came rushing back to her. Confronted with yet again the harsh reality of her body being violently violated, fear took a deathly grip on her.

On 27th February 2011, she ran away from her employer’s house in the afternoon to HOME. She has not heard from her employer since, and is also unsure if the employer made a police report. “I heard from Sister Bridget that my employer told my agency that I ran away because I stole some jewellery from them,” she said.

***

Still visibly shaken but determined to hold her own, Nakisha hopes to find another employment. “Maybe the next employer is good,” she said softly.

However, pertaining to making a police report, Nakisha told me that she is currently unsure of her intentions. “I am still thinking about it,” she said.

Bridget added that “We’re also waiting for the psychological test results to see if she can withstand – mentally and emotionally – the interrogation process should she decides to take it to the police. Of course we advise her to, but this is her choice.”


To find out more about HOME, click here.

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Ng Eng Hen: Dust clouds likely caused armoured vehicle collision during Exercise Wallaby

Dust clouds limiting visibility likely contributed to the collision between two Hunter vehicles during Exercise Wallaby, Defence Minister Ng Eng Hen explained in his parliamentary reply. 12 servicemen sustained mild injuries, but safety measures prevented more serious outcomes. A formal investigation is ongoing to ensure further safety improvements.

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SINGAPORE: Low visibility caused by dust clouds was identified as the likely cause of the collision between two Hunter armoured fighting vehicles (AFVs) during Exercise Wallaby last month, Defence Minister Ng Eng Hen said in a written parliamentary response on Tuesday (15 October).

The incident, which occurred in Queensland, Australia, on 24 September 2024, resulted in mild injuries to 12 servicemen.

Dr Ng’s statement was in response to a parliamentary question from Mr Dennis Tan, Workers’ Party Member of Parliament for Hougang SMC.

Mr Tan asked for details on the accident, specifically its cause and whether any lessons could be applied to enhance training and operational safety within the Singapore Armed Forces (SAF).

The collision took place during a night-time movement of Hunter AFVs at the Shoalwater Bay Training Area.

The vehicles were returning to base when one rear-ended another. Dr Ng explained that the dust clouds generated by the AFVs’ movement significantly impaired visibility, might likely contributing to the accident.

The 12 affected servicemen sustained mild injuries and were promptly taken to the nearest medical facility.

None of the injuries required hospitalisation, and all 12 servicemen were able to rejoin their units for training the next day.

According to the minister, adherence to safety protocols—such as wearing seat belts and protective gear—played a crucial role in limiting the injuries to mild ones.

Following the incident, a safety pause was immediately implemented, with all drivers being reminded to maintain proper safety distances, especially when visibility was compromised.

Troops were also reminded to adhere strictly to safety protocols, including the proper use of safety equipment, Dr Ng added.

The safety lessons from the incident were shared not only with the affected units but also with other participating groups in the exercise, as well as units back in Singapore, through dedicated safety briefings.

Mr Tan also asked about the broader implications of the incident. In his response, Dr Ng said that a formal investigation had been launched in accordance with SAF’s safety incident protocol.

The investigation aims to assess the circumstances more thoroughly and identify any further measures that could be taken to enhance safety.

Dr Ng shared that recommendations arising from the investigation will be implemented where necessary.

Exercise Wallaby is SAF’s largest unilateral overseas exercise, and the 2024 edition began on 8 September, running until 3 November.

The exercise involves approximately 6,200 personnel, including 500 operationally ready national servicemen.

The exercise has been conducted at Shoalwater Bay Training Area in Queensland since 1990, and it is a key part of SAF’s overseas training program.

The Hunter AFV, one of the vehicles involved in the collision, is a state-of-the-art platform jointly developed by the Defence Science and Technology Agency, the Singapore Army, and ST Engineering.

It replaced the SAF’s aging fleet of Ultra M113 AFVs in 2019, which had been in service since the 1970s. The Hunter is equipped with advanced features, including a 30mm cannon, a 76mm smoke grenade launcher, and an automatic target detection and

tracking system designed to enhance operational effectiveness. It is also capable of traveling at increased speeds and covering longer distances, making it a versatile asset for the SAF.

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Government to “carefully consider” Lee Hsien Yang’s demolition application for 38 Oxley Road

The Singapore Government will “carefully consider” Mr Lee Hsien Yang (LHY)’s application to demolish the house at 38 Oxley Road. LHY announced his intent on Tuesday morning following the recent death of his sister, Dr Lee Wei Ling, reaffirming his commitment to honour his parents’ wish for the house’s demolition.

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The Singapore Government has indicated that it will “carefully consider” Mr Lee Hsien Yang’s (LHY) application to demolish the family home at 38 Oxley Road.

LHY, the youngest son of Singapore’s founding Prime Minister, the late Lee Kuan Yew (LKY), announced his intention to apply for the demolition in a Facebook post on 15 October 2024, following the death of his sister, Dr Lee Wei Ling, on 9 October.

The announcement marks a significant development in the ongoing saga over the fate of the historically significant property, which has been at the heart of a family dispute since LKY’s passing in 2015.

In his will, executed in December 2013, LKY expressed his desire for the house to be demolished “immediately after” Dr Lee moved out of the property. Dr Lee, a prominent neurologist, had been the last remaining resident of the house.

LHY reaffirmed his commitment to carrying out his father’s wishes, stating, “After my sister’s passing, I am the only living executor of my father’s estate. It is my duty to carry out his wishes to the fullest extent of the law.”

He added that he would seek to build a small private dwelling on the site, which would be “held within the family in perpetuity”.

LHY also referenced his brother, Senior Minister Lee Hsien Loong’s (LHL) remarks in Parliament in 2015, when he was Prime Minister, stating that upon Dr Lee’s passing, the decision to demolish the house would rest with the “Government of the day.”

In response to media queries regarding LHY’s announcement, a spokesperson for the Ministry of National Development (MND) acknowledged the intended application and emphasised that the Government would “carefully consider issues related to the property in due course”.

The spokesperson also highlighted that any decision would need to balance LKY’s wishes, public interest, and the historical value of the house.

The house at 38 Oxley Road, where key decisions about Singapore’s path to independence were made, has been a focal point of public and political discussion.

The future of the house became contentious in 2017 when LHY and Dr Lee publicly accused their elder brother, LHL, of trying to preserve the house against their father’s wishes for political reasons.

LHL denied the accusations, issuing a Ministerial Statement in Parliament, where he also raised concerns over the preparation of their father’s final will. He clarified that he had recused himself from all decisions regarding the property and affirmed that any government action would be impartial.

In 2018, a “secret” ministerial committee, which was formed in 2016 to study the future of 38 Oxley Road, proposed three options: preserving the property and designating it as a national monument, partially demolishing the house while retaining the historically significant basement dining room, or allowing complete demolition for redevelopment. LHL accepted the committee’s conclusions but stated that no immediate decision was necessary, as Dr Lee was still living in the house.

In a statement conveyed by LHY on behalf of Dr Lee after her passing, she reiterated her strong support for her father’s wish to demolish the house. “My father, Lee Kuan Yew, and my mother, Kwa Geok Choo, had an unwavering and deeply felt wish for their house at 38 Oxley Road to be demolished upon the last parent’s death,” the statement read.

She added, “He had also appealed directly to the people of Singapore. Please honour my father by honouring his wish for his home to be demolished.”

Despite selling the house to LHY at market value in 2015, LHL’s stance regarding the house’s preservation became a public issue, especially after the family disclosed that the Government had raised concerns about reinstating the demolition clause in the 2013 will. The ministerial committee had reviewed the matter, but a final decision was deferred until now.

The fate of 38 Oxley Road remains to be seen, but the Government’s decision will likely have lasting implications for the legacy of the Lee family and the conservation of Singapore’s historical landmarks.

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