Suggestions on how to prevent deaths on MRT tracks

Due to the recent spate of incidences involving MRT trains being held up by people who jump onto tracks causing train delays, I’ve decided to do something civic-minded with my creativity for once. Below is a list of 5 suggestions on how we can prevent deaths on MRT tracks.

1. Erect barb wires along the MRT platform screen doors. Not only will it deter people from climbing over, but those who do will find themselves tangled up by the wires, and will be easy to apprehend when it such a state.

2. Design hover-engines for the MRT trains. This way, should anyone successfully make it onto the platform despite the barb wires, the train will simply skim over them as they lay on the tracks, thereby not causing any train delays.

3. Inspired by bulldozers and baseball gloves, I came up with an innovative way which the train can safely ‘pick up’ the person on the track as it enters the station, and cradle him snugly as the train continues on its journey. Again, leading to no unnecessary delays as the person can be held in the ‘glove’ until the train is taken off service. Of course the whole device – termed the ‘Jumper Catcher’ will be made of soft padded materials. There will be cushions inside the cradle area so that the jumper can enjoy the open-canopy experience in comfort.

4. If idea number 3 is too expensive, and since it is likely that the cost of executing will be passed onto commuters to maintain the annual billion-dollar profits, a cheaper alternative would be attach giant springs at the bottom of each segment of the track. The spring mechanism will be triggered by a suddenly change in weight, such that, if something heavy, say, a person falls onto the track, the segment which he falls on will ‘pop’ and throw him back onto the platform, out of harms way, and more important not leading to unnecessary train delays.

5. Then we can have an even cheaper method – which is to pull positive pictures and slogans on every visible spot in the train station. Possible slogans include “Always look on the bright side of life”, “every dark cloud has a silver-lining” and “It ain’t over till it’s over.” Not-so-encouraged slogans – “I feel so rich everytime i receive my MONTHLY CPF statement”.

Of course, we could simply stop and ask – are there more people jumping off MRT tracks? And why?

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By Joshua Chiang

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