By Phillip Ang
Dear Citizens,
The gahmen sincerely apologises for another preventable cock up at Hong Lim Park on 27 September. We acknowledge our error that common sense was not exercised. There was clearly a potential for conflict for the 2 events to be scheduled at the same time.
Our officer has explained that a very popular hip hop, Facebook editor minister was available only in the afternoon. As such, the officer was pressured into approving both events for which he will now have to hentak-kaki.
The gahmen also acknowledges the valid concerns about agencies under the MND. Recall the recent incident involving a fishball stick in August? We have set up an oversight office to coordinate the different agencies to remove all fishball sticks from not-clearly demarcated areas. It will be called the Municipal Services Office or MiSO.
Although there was no need to set up a new office for the NParks Brompton bikes case, the NParks cock up on Saturday is unacceptable. In our view, the only solution, again, is to set up another office. This office will have oversight of all the different agencies under the MND which deal with the public to ensure minimal cock ups in future.
The new office will be named Cock Up Prevention Authority or CUPA for short. When in doubt, all agencies under the MND must seek its assistance. It will also conduct courses to instill some common sense in our laid back civil servants, all the way to Grade MR1. Rest assured, CUPA’s CEO will not be selected from NParks. Or the MND.
The gahmen hopes to regain the public’s trust and that citizens will accept our sincere apology for the honest mistake.
Yours sincerely
GAHMEN
This satirical piece was first published on likedatosocanmeh.
